Lately, TONS of people are following my blog. That’s it. Following.
No likes, no comments, no reading of much. Following.
Every day, a TON of new people read https://seapunk2.wordpress.com/2012/05/01/lets-do-lunch/, written nearly one year ago.
Frankly, I’m puzzled, and that’s saying a lot. What are they following? The Lunch Menu?
Does the TON expect more humorous posts about lunchtime? Are they expecting recipes? Are they waiting for a heavenly sign to lift their spirits?
What directs the TON to click the follow button? Where are they coming from?
Have I lost my marvels, I mean, marbles on the way to the kitchen?
Is the post THAT funny? Is it published somewhere and the TONS stumble upon it?
I heard a family member attempt to read it aloud. I couldn’t shrink small enough, it was thoroughly embarrassing. If I wrote what I heard, then I demand to be exiled from the planet, or the very least, the word factory in my head.
It’s okay, the right side works just as well as the left.
Do I have to feed the TONS?
I hope not, I already feed over a TON a day here at home.
What are you all doing here, anyway? Doesn’t look like much…
I’m wondering if it’s some new kind of spam, or a way to direct me to their lunch menus or even a rouse for a sales pitch. If that’s it, I eat organically. Further, having sold cars in a former life, I’m not an easy sell, because I’m fully aware of all the automated crap that spews from your face, or fingertips.
I went back and read the blog post. It’s amusing.
I suppose some would find it funny, like ha ha kind of funny, and some, entertaining, and some may write their own funny stuff, with my post as a jumping off point.
Some may even find it thoroughly unacceptable.
If I average out 200 people at 180 pounds each,
I am carrying an extra 36000 pounds of followers,
and that easily quantifies the TONS.
Maybe they should follow me to the moon.
There, the 200 and I will weigh a mere 6000 pounds.
I think I can handle three TONS who say nothing,
in place of the eighteen who say the same. Ready?
I know I am!