This is a follow-up to the cliff hanger https://seapunk2.wordpress.com/2012/12/28/prying-into-the-lives-of-dead-people-and-the-living-too/
I queried an innocent bystander with a delicate, yet sensitively written set of questions. The answers to those questions hung in my mind like wet laundry hanging on a clothesline and never dries.
My grandfather married the innocent bystander’s grandmother some time in the 1940’s. I’ve heard from someone who knew my grandfather, who shall remain nameless, that he “loved the ladies, loved the ladies.”
I don’t know where grandfather was born or who his parents were. His first son was my birth father, and I’m the result of my birth father’s fling with my mother. With DNA testing, I had hoped to prove or find some connections through www.ancestry.com. I’ve been successful with some of my lineage, especially through my birth father’s mother (my grandmother) but no records or links to my grandfather, or any that I can pinpoint.
The innocent bystander responded directly to some of my questions and not at all, to others. Frankly, I’m stunned at getting a response at all!
These are his words:
“Delora is my FATHER.” (I knew that already, as I had questioned his father’s name)
“I was told that my grandmother worked with a spanish (sic) lady and her son was killed in ww2. (sic) So my grandmother told her that if she had a son she would name him Delora. The woman told her that the name meant “of gold” in spanish.” (sic)
According to my research, Delora means sorrows in Spanish. Latin, it means pain, sadness, suffering. French, it translates to from the ocean or de l’eau. Gold? Something gold sounds much happier than sorrows, pain, sadness, suffering. I think I can recognize manipulation when I see it.
Delora – 100% female name. Delora, who may be my Uncle, was given a feminine name. Why? If the story told is true, who was the boy child named for? The Spanish woman, a figment of someone’s imagination? Or a deceased son, whose given name was feminine? And why was the woman, who was important enough to have a child named for her or her lost son, never in their lives, but a co-worker, in the shadows?
Delora being the middle name of my birth father and grandfather, and second husband to the innocent bystander’s grandmother – sorry, I’m not only curious, but don’t believe the story. The “I was told” is enough for me. People will say anything to shut someone up when they don’t want you to ask further or the question makes them squirm.
My gut tells me that we share a grandfather and the innocent bystander doesn’t know it, or, my grandfather “loved the ladies” and his grandmother was one of them. If we do share a grandfather, we’re cousins. I’m not saying anything more to the man. My line in the sand______________________.
I asked about his Uncle Henry, also a son of his grandmother. Henry is my grandfather’s first name.
These are his words:
“Uncle Henry I haven’t seen in like 24 years. last I knew he was somewhere in NH.” (sic)
He did mention that he “never did the dna test.”
If he does, he could be seriously dazed and confused.
He chose not to respond to my question about why his father was raised by his aunt and uncle for the first four years of his life, and what happened to his grandmother, to make her leave and then “come back for him.”
I suppose I’ll push-off now, and lead myself down another path, in search of the truth. It’s out there. I hope you enjoyed the cruise.