Do you believe in fairies?  I do.

The Invisible Fashion Fairy freely takes the liberty to add to, or edit the clothes I’m wearing on any given day, often enough to let me know they exist.   They’re not nice about it, either!  The Invisible Fashion Fairy’s job is to humiliate, irritate, surprise and especially, embarrass me, when I figure out that I’ve been altered.  Here’s a sample of some of the fairies’ shenanigans –

  1. A lollipop stick stuck to my sweater, under my forearm.  Invisible Fashion Fairy…
  2. A sock, or dryer sheet, holding tight, outside my peripheral vision.  Guess who?
  3. A pair of underwear inside the leg of my pants. Is that what that lump was?
  4. Part of my last meal, somewhere on the front of me. No, I’m not a slob! Fashion Fairies…
  5. A garment with the sales tag still on it. Am I blind?  You bet I am! Those fairies pulled the wool over my eyes!
  6. I have a rip in the back of my pants.  Are you kidding me?  😦
  7. Seed heads, such as teasel, cocklebur, bedstraw, thistle, devil’s claw.  It’s not called devil’s claw because is soft and fluffy! Fairy, indeed!
  8. Toilet paper, impersonating a flag, attached to my shoe. Fashion Fairies like classic comedy.  They’ve had lots of practice with this alteration.
  9. Something in my teeth.  Why does it always have to be GREEN?
  10. Leaky pen ink, in, or on my pocket or purse. This is becoming a less powerful statement by the Fairies, as ink pens are on their “endangered additions” list.
  11. Stink. From someone else, to me. If it’s a severe stink, it’s a stench. Invisible Fashion Fairies enjoy the ripening process! How gauche….
  12. A smile, caused by secret thoughts while completely in my own little world. It’s odd, though. I guess smiling isn’t always in fashion, so they kind of push it on me…
  13. My zipper is down and I’m having a coming out party!  I’m not a party kind of gal, so – Hey, Fairies, grow up, will ya?
  14. My hair has gum in it.  That’s just mean.

Further information on the whereabouts of the Invisible Fashion Fairy unknown. I did hear of one individual who caught a glimpse of the Fashion Fairy.  His response?

Fashion Fairy Witness statement

Sooner or later, they’ll be putting things on you and altering your wardrobe, too. Carry on!

 

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